Such an excellent place to climb by new rambler https://www.flickr.com/photos/newrambler/348660163/
Walking home from exercise class in the morning allows me to observe some of the most beautiful scenes. I see parents walking their children to local schools, or to the bus to magnet schools. Early morning is alive with the freshness of possibility…
Last week I saw a father and son (my estimate – 10 years old). Father, in shorts and sneakers gently commandeered the 26-inch bicycle by clutching the handlebars, while his son, in a dusty-blue t-shirt replete with backpack, rode hands and feet free. They were engrossed in discussing blue fish…Son’s posture on the seat, was centered and erect, assisting the patrilineal, aerodynamic effort…
So much love was demonstrated. What struck me was the bond between the two men. As a parent of three, I understand the underpinnings of trusting conversation. Without mutual respect over the years, many prepubescent children will have “tuned out” by middle school because their peer relationships take front-and-center stage.
I remember with joy when my children were young: mornings, 3 p.m., dinner, and bedtimes were special because the little ones were open, talkative and eager. So much was shared: it was here that the lines of communication were developed. In the morning, fresh from sleep, a new day was beginning. At 3 p.m., and dinnertime, we had many questions about their day. At bedtime, we read stories…and answered questions…
I want to celebrate fatherhood. Dads are so important in the development of boys as well as girls. Twenty years ago, a colleague and friend, Leonard, told me his theory of the missing father: “There is a father hunger. Either Dad is emotionally not there, or he’s working so hard he’s not physically there, or he’s left the family or he’s dead.”
In all my years of schooling, I hadn’t heard this before. For boys, a missing father is especially challenging because the same-sex parent is less- or not available. Girls miss out as well in different ways…
I’ve been lucky that I didn’t experience an absent father. My Dad was home during the day as he worked nights in the family business. He had the patience of a saint, and the explanations of a philosopher. He was a very good cook although my mother prepared most of our meals. Mom was amazing in the kitchen…
When I was five or so, I crayoned what I would still consider an ugly picture of Santa Claus. Dad, an artist, liked it so much that he captured it in our home movies for all to see. Yikes…
Dad was strict about curfew, and so as a teen I was happy that he was away at night. I had the best of both worlds – my gentle father in daytime coupled with the softness of my mother at dusk…(You can expect an essay about Mothers…)
My brother has said that Dad was the mortar to the bricks that held the family together. We agree. Dad was avant-garde in so many ways that I appreciate now…He gardened for some of our vegetables, made raviolis (with Mom’s help); built a swimming pool (on his own) using cinderblocks. Dad increased the pool height by adding an additional cinderblock as we grew. We had such fun splashing in the water with our friends and cousins…
Luckily, we have home movies from the fifties and sixties to remind us of us how we acted and looked. He baked bread and created our birthday cakes – from scratch, inserting a music box after the round loaves were baked. We children were amazed by the magical noise radiating from the confection as Mom cut it into slices. These were some of the most beautiful, professionally decorated desserts. (When I was a toddler, Dad went to baking school.)
My parents were beloved by many, and we four siblings miss our parents who passed in 2014. For today, let me say: M Y D A D R O C K S…
Check out prior blogs around the parental topic:
Trust you are enjoying the fall weather, as we move into October this morning…
Speak to you on November 5th, when we will have moved into Daylight Savings Time.
Are you ready?
Peace and Light,
Linda
PS: Check out prior blogs around the parental topic:
https://lindamarsanico.com/single-post/2016/06/06/From-Sapling-to-Beloved-King-Maple
https://lindamarsanico.com/single-post/2015/05/25/REMEMBERING
https://lindamarsanico.com/single-post/2014/12/08/BELOVED-TRANSITION
#Fathers #Daughters #localschools #26inchbicycle #ridinghandsfree #bondbetweenmen #opencommunication #bedtimestories #afterschool #Fatherhunger #SantaClaus #absentFather #teencurfew #raviolis #waterfun #birthdaycakes
