In my last post “I’m In A New York Marathon State Of Mind,” I suggest that we get in shape, emotionally and spiritually, to balance and exercise total health; that we need to look at our internal-feeling “… self,…who gets…angry, impatient, critical, holds grudges and grief…” I believe that growing self-love is essential for total health!
How do we grow self-love? I’d like to share an outline for change that moves us toward this goal:
- Know what you are thinking.
- Recognize your typical behavioral responses.
- Understand the roots of your attitudes and behaviors.
- Use mantra and meditation.
Let’s look at THINKING:
Notice (step back to observe) the thoughts, which permeate, roll through the mind, effortlessly. When the thoughts are negative, we can work to replace these with positive sets of ideas. We can create a new, internal dialog so that we speak (internally) to our self the way a loving parent speaks to their child, the way we wish our parents spoke to us.
The work is to create thoughts, which are positive, especially because they lead the way for our 50+ trillion cells. Thoughts create energy and direction in the body. Positive thinking is associated with good health.
Let’s look at our TYPICAL BEHAVIORAL RESPONSES:
Notice the way we respond in social situations. Is our reaction what we want to repeat? Is the rejoinder consistent with the person we wish to become? If we’re unhappy with our usual comeback (which probably comes from our unconscious), we can change it.
In this step, we’re evaluating the behavior, deciding that we can develop it. We can update to a desired response and practice this change. This allows us to align our unconscious and conscious mind. With this consistency, we begin to take charge of our actions because the unconscious will be less able to contradict our deliberate efforts. Further, we choose to move toward total health by starting up the process of integrating our personality. This step involves true grit, because it’s a lot of work to resolve internal conflicts – becoming ‘of one mind.’ I’ve written before that we are in a position to ‘update the software in our brain.’ See Blogs:
Let’s look at the ROOTS OF BEHAVIOR WE WISH TO CHANGE:
Our attitudes and behaviors take years to develop from early childhood, and can easily be out of our conscious memory. These personal viewpoints may feel like an instinctive aspect of self. On the contrary, most of these attitudes and behaviors are not immutable. They were slowly acquired from our family, culture, bureaucracies – before our ego was developed (roughly around the age of seven), when we took in these approaches and notions without assessment. The idea is to pull up these roots; to heal and let them go, replacing them with notions that suit us. The choice to consult with a psychologist or licensed counselor, for guidance, may be helpful here.
Now, we have an opportunity to re-evaluate these attitudes to make them current with our developing beliefs as an adult. We can ask: “What do I really feel about this?” “What do I wish to choose here? I believe this is an ongoing process ‘of becoming’ the person we wish to be.
With an intention to know our self more, our spiritual guides assist in the process by bringing situations and teachers to our path.
Let’s look at MANTRA AND MEDITATION:
MANTRA is a word or phrase, which is repeated for a desired effect. Examples: Om, I AM loved, I AM safe, Love. Virtually any constructive word, phrase or sentence can be used to create calm and wellbeing. Your choice.
I use mantra throughout the day, when my mind is cluttered with details, when I can’t concentrate and let go of ‘thinking.’ Or, when I wish to re-establish my connection with the flow of All That Is.
MEDITATION is an essential practice/skill we use to get beyond our 3rd dimensional, thinking mind. (It’s important to understand that we are more than our ‘thoughts.’) At the beginning, we aim to relax. As we progress, we connect into and beyond our spiritual self to connect with All That Is. We aim to access our Higher Self…into enlightenment…toward pure awareness.
I meditate in some fashion each day, even if it’s for 3-5 minutes. This short version is
“More than a power nap” according to one of my clients.
I am happy to share the main points of my workout plan for ‘being in shape.’ Together with physical exercise, we can ready our self for the holidays, where we will be eating, drinking and socializing. These can be exhausting, but with forethought and mindfulness, we are equipped to navigate with a steady hand on the rudder of our wind-blown boat…
Speak to you on December 8th.